F.A. Cup Round-Up
Ooh, the FA Cup, eh? It evokes such blissful nostalgia. You’d stick a tuppence through the turnstile, buy your Bovril and pie and make your way to the terraces. There was old Bobby Rutherford and Peter Castle playing up-front, the pitch would be as muddy as hell and the tackles would be flying in from Norman “Cruncher” Harris. At the end of the game you’d go home and play Subbuteo whilst reading Roy of the Rovers and watching Match of the Day on an old black and white telly. That’s what the FA Cup was all about.
I know where you think this is going, but I’m electing to skip the awkward and dull ‘Has the cup lost its magic’ debate in favour of celebrating a pretty exciting weekend of knockout action. We had a few upsets, a couple of barnstorming games and some juicy controversy. This round-up begins, rather predictably, in Manchester.
Manchester City 2-3 Manchester United
Despite the ample number of goals, the scoreline in this game doesn’t fairly reflect the drama and intrigue the latest Manchester Derby provided us. In what was no doubt one of the defining games of the season for these two clubs, City will likely feel somewhat aggrieved to have been on the bitter, losing end of this very open, exciting tie.
It started off looking comfortable for City, who seldom surrendered possession in the first ten minutes of the game. Though their chances were meek, they seemed to have the element of control in the early part of the match, refusing to give the ball back like an angry child who'd just been told he wasn't allowed to play with the other kids. However, that changed almost in an instant as United finally got their foot on the ball, instigated a single counter attack and scored. Rooney blasted into the box with a powerful header that second-choice man mountain goalkeeper Costel Pantilimon could do nothing about.
It was a setback for Manchester City, but by no means a disaster – no, that would have to wait two minutes before Vincent Kompany was sent-off for a two-footed but very placid tackle on Nani. The decision has been hotly argued over and thousands have died in the ensuing clashes. Whilst you can see why the referee has chosen to issue a red card, you have to ask whether common sense should have prevailed in this case. After all, sending off the home captain during a big derby match just 12 minutes into the game should be the very last resort for a referee, and leeway ought to be given accordingly.
This did nothing to help City, who seemed to quieten down whilst United grew into the game with more and more confidence. On the half-hour mark, Danny Welbeck did extremely well to perform a full-body joint reshuffle and hook in a half-volley, making it 2-0. Just before the break, Aleksandar Kolarov brought down Welbeck in the box and Rooney reacted first when Pantilimon saved his initial penalty, heading home for an ominous 3-0 lead at half-time.
City were never likely to collapse far enough to give United the satisfaction of six goals, but their comeback was a big surprise and a positive sign of their resilience. Having presumably been shouted at by an Italian for 15 minutes, the home side came onto the field with a renewed belief, and early on in the second half Kolarov completed a personal redemption by expertly whipping a free-kick past Anders Lindegaard. City were suddenly looking like the more rampant team, despite their shortage in manpower.
That morning, it had been announced that squinty ginger pass-machine Paul Scholes was to haul his rear end out of his armchair and back into the unforgiving world of top-flight football. He re-introduced himself to the foray during the second half to thunderous applause, but his dream return was rather scuppered when he gave the ball away to James Milner. Milner found Aguero in the box, and after bashing Lindegaard with the ball for a bit the Argentine stuck it in the back of the net to make it 3-2.
City threw pressure onto the faces of United, but it was in vain. Despite a late penalty appeal when Phil Jones, who'd had an off-beat day, handled the ball, City just could not get that equaliser. It will have been encouraging for City fans to have seen such a spirited display, but that doesn’t soften the blow of losing to their despised rivals much. Both teams had lost out on their major European ambitions, but for City now it really is just a case of whether they win the league or not that will classify this season as either a triumph or a disaster (I know they’re in the Carling Cup as well, but I don’t think that’s what players with the reputations of Aguero and Silva came here to win).
Jumping Jillikers! That was a long one. Let’s do some other, smaller ones now.
Swindon Town 2-1 Wigan Athletic
League Two Swindon probably achieved the biggest upset of the round by beating an unglamorous but fairly strengthy Wigan outfit on Saturday. Following a decent early start by The Robins, they were unlucky to concede a penalty when Callum McManaman (who wins the award for having the name that is most fun to type) was taken down in the box. Ben Watson struck the post, but McManaman was on hand to force the goal. I quite like it when an away team does that actually, because you get that lovely collective groan following the excited cheer.
Swindon might have lost their bottle, but for the exploits of Portsmouth-born midfielder Matt Ritchie. His flair and class changed the game in the underdogs’ favour, with his thumping cross finding the head of Alan Connell, who glanced home to equalise just before half-time. Later on, Ritchie’s distance drive was expertly bounced off the legs of Paul Benson, wrong-footing Ali Al-Habsi and sending the ball in the back of the net.
For Wigan, another struggle in the murky pits of the Premier League may take aid from this early cup exit, but that will take nothing away from the Swindon celebrations. After the game, tattooed Italian madman and Swindon manager Paolo Di Canio was delighted with his first major day in the limelight as a coach, and dedicated the victory to his father.
Macclesfield Town 2-2 Bolton Wanderers
Macclesfield came close to sidling their way into the spotlight when they gave Bolton a fright and forced a replay from Owen Coyle’s off-form side. Having gone behind after Klasnic bundled the ball home early on, Adam Bogdan, who's face was still a deep shade of red following Tim Howard's lovely strike over him, was kept on his guard by a rampant display from the home team. It didn’t take long for the Hungarian to be beaten though, as a speedy and effective breakaway was completed by Colin Daniel.
In the second half, Arnaud Mendy scored an absolutely brilliant goal to put Macclesfield ahead. He took two touches, one to flick the ball up in the air and one to crash in a volley, and found the top corner of the net with tantalising conviction. However, this moment of magic did not bring the victory that it deserved, with David Wheater using the natural bulkiness of his 6 foot 5 framework to charge a header into the back of the net for Bolton. Macclesfield held on through a spell of pressure towards the end and earned themselves a replay. They enjoyed a cup day to remember, but it’s unlikely The Silkmen will be progressing any further.
MK Dons 1-1 QPR
Neil Warnock suffered hardest from the ‘magic of the cup’ when QPR were almost left red-faced by an MK Dons side that were much more determined than the opposing Premier League outfit. Flying high in League One, the Dons carried plenty of confidence into the tie and had some excellent chances to take the lead. A tight offside decision and a penalty shout aside, the Dons created a few good chances before Dean Bowditch battled the ball off Heidar Helguson and slotted home to give the home side a deserved lead.
It would have been a well-earned surprise victory had it not been for the late mix-up between the goalkeeper and defence that allowed Helguson to steal in and poach a goal that was every bit as cheeky as Bowditch’s opener. Regardless of the last-minute equaliser, Neil Warnock (affectionately known as Colin) found himself out of the job on Sunday evening, with his likely replacement being Mark Hughes (but more on that next time). Dons manager Karl Robinson has promised to “have a go” in the replay, and given their excellent performance you wouldn’t bet against them completing the upset.
Crawley Town 1-0 Bristol City
Crawley’s rise to prominence continued with a hard-fought victory over Championship relegation-line tip-toers Bristol City. The first-half would have reflected Crawley’s dominance in the scoreline had it not been for a seemingly jagged inside post, which somehow prevented efforts from Thompson and Tubbs sliding into the goal.
In the second half rotundly-named Matt Tubbs, who has scored a number of important goals for Crawley including 40 in their promotion year, was put through on goal by a scything pass from Sergio Torres. He had the experience to put it past veteran ‘keeper David James, and that was all Crawley needed to confirm their place in the fourth round.
Newcastle United 2-1 Blackburn Rovers
Could it finally be their year? Newcastle are probably in the best position to win a major trophy since Alan Shearer retired, with many key players on the form of their lives and the team as a unit functioning well. In the face of an early setback when David Goodwillie scored another two-yard scrambler, Newcastle eventually showed that they had the class to dispatch Steve Kean’s jaded and downbeat men.
Hatem Ben Arfa briefly turned into Lionel Messi when he outfoxed the Blackburn defence multiple times in a row before lofting the ball past Mark Bunn in goal. Alan Pardew called it the best goal he’d ever seen, and in fairness to him it was a superb individual effort. It was just a shame that ITV felt the clip was only worth rushing through once and with no deliberation (more on that further down).
In the fifth minute of stoppage time, Jonas Gutierrez knocked away a dramatic winner to give Newcastle a place in the fourth round, as well as allowing himself an opportunity to cosplay as a slap-dash Spiderman.
Arsenal 1-0 Leeds United
From the moment Thierry Henry signed the loan deal to take him back to Arsenal for two months, this game was only ever going to be about one beardy Frenchman. The Emirates Stadium lapped up his presence with the enthusiasm of a child at Christmas. This was Arsenal’s very own ‘Return of the King’, and boy did he take to his throne with style.
Leeds spent the first-half being irritatingly handy in defence, with Arsenal only allowed a handful of decent chances on goal. With Robin van Persie taking an oddly-timed break in Dubai, the Arsenal attack lacked the vigour, creativity and clinical finishing the Dutchman has carried with him all season. It only made sense that Henry was going to make an appearance, and it only made sense that he would end up scoring the decisive goal.
Indeed, in the second-half King Thierry graced the audience to a might reception. He doffed his crown before focussing on channelling the natural passion he had for the club into an effective performance. Within ten minutes, Alex Song cut through the Leeds defence with a clever pass and Henry took two touches to stroke the ball home past Lonergan. The Frenchman went crazy, celebrating like he’d just given birth to Jesus.
It was a fitting way for Henry to begin his second spell at Arsenal, and it now remains to be seen as to whether or not Thierry can still hack it against Premier League opposition.
The rest
Because there was a lot going on this weekend, I’m going to do a one sentence summary of the remaining fixtures.
Barnsley 2-4 Swansea City: Danny Graham scored a beautiful drive as Nathan Dyer pulled the strings in the Swansea midfield to lead the Swans to a victory in an entertaining fixture (that was only let down by the fact it made some Welsh people happy).
Birmingham City 0-0 Wolverhampton Wanderers: Absolutely nothing happened and everyone hated it.
Brighton & HA 1-1 Wrexham: Unpronounceably named midfielder Adrian Cieslewicz performed a dainty dribble and deflected a goal in to give non-league Wrexham a valuable replay.
Bristol Rovers 1-3 Aston Villa: Pensioner Scott McGleish scored a nice flick but missed a penalty as Aston Villa showed too much class for Bristol Rovers to contain.
Chelsea 4-0 Portsmouth: A rather flattering result for Chelsea who thumped Pompey in a repeat of the 2010 FA Cup Final (except with lots more goals).
Coventry City 1-2 Southampton: Lowly Coventry took an early lead, but Danny Fox was the big provider with two assists for Southampton in an all-Championship affair which ended with top beating bottom.
Dagenham & Redbridge 0-0 Millwall: League Two Dagenham frustrated Millwall and earned a replay in another uneventful affair that I wish I wasn't talking about because I couldn't fit anything interesting into that sentence.
Derby County 1-0 Crystal Palace: Palace players ran around with Wembley in the corner of their eyes as Derby won against the distracted side.
Doncaster Rovers 0-2 Notts County: Jeff Hughes enjoys a smiley brace as Doncaster collapse like a dying whale to another poor defeat.
Everton 2-0 Tamworth: Brave effort from Tamworth is sullied by two unspectacular goals from Heitinga and Baines, leaving everyone to groan in sympathy.
Fleetwood Town 1-5 Blackpool: Ian Holloway’s side romps to victory as Matt Phillips scores a hat-trick and Lomana LuaLua evokes an instinctual euphoria in Sam Matterface.
Fulham 4-0 Charlton Athletic: Yankee-doodle hat-trick from Clint Dempsey kills off any hopes of an all-London derby becoming host to an upset.
Gillingham 1-3 Stoke City: Gills take the lead through Kedwell, but Pulis’ side shows the usual fight to turn the game around and keep The Potters in with a chance of repeating last season’s cup run.
Hull City 3-1 Ipswich Town: Some truly embarrassing defending from Ipswich and a sumptuous strike from Tom Cairney aid Hull to a simple victory.
Middlesbrough 1-0 Shrewsbury Town: Marvin Emnes casually pokes home a winner in an unspectacular affair.
Norwich City 4-1 Burnley: A flying start from the Canaries sees them into the next round, despite chunky striker Grant Holt missing a penalty.
Nottingham Forest 0-0 Leicester City: Both goalkeepers were forced to make some strong-handed saves to keep the game at an unhelpful stalemate.
Peterborough United 0-2 Sunderland: Jim Beglin falls asleep to the disappointment of no-one as Larsson’s frustratingly effective free-kicks and a James McLean goal see off the Posh challenge.
Reading 0-1 Stevenage: The Hertfordshire side gain a modestly surprising victory courtesy of Darius Charles’ first-half strike.
Sheffield United 3-1 Salisbury: The steak-loving underdogs were undone by a nutmeg, a chested effort and an own goal.
Sheffield Wednesday 1-0 West Ham United: Chris O’Grady crashes a late drive past uppity intellectual goalkeeper Ruud Boffin to give Wednesday a shock victory.
Tottenham 3-0 Cheltenham Town: Jermain Defoe commits shameful goal-theft as Dos Santos stars in Spurs rout.
Watford 4-2 Bradford City: Craig Forsyth plays his cards right as he earns a brace, including an excellent 25-yard piledriver, to help the Hornets to the victory.
West Bromwich Albion 4-2 Cardiff City: Simon Cox is on hand to fend off a dogged fightback from Cardiff, scoring a lovely hat-trick in the process.
Fourth Round Draw
Aside from all the annoying football that quite frankly gets in the way, one of the best things about an FA Cup weekend is the draw for the next round. There’s something faintly exciting about two men standing there with their hands fondling lots of balls (Two points for anyone who can spot the extremely subtle euphemisms in that sentence).
The Fourth Round Draw offered an interesting outcome. Without doubt, the biggest match of the weekend will be Manchester United’s second derby of the tournament away to Liverpool. The tension surrounding the game will only have been heightened by the recent dispute between Luis Suarez and Patrice Evra, and I’m certain that in a cup environment Liverpool will be giving their absolute all to turn Manchester United over. It promises to be a spectacularly entertaining fixture.
That aside, there’s quite a few all-Premier-League ties (potentially seven). This works out well for the smaller teams who have been drawn against each other, offering them that little ray of opportunity to reach the latter stages and get that once-in-a-lifetime day out in the sunshine. Certainly, the winners of the games between Stevenage and Notts County, Hull and Crawley, Blackpool and Sheffield Wednesday, and Forest/Leicester vs Swindon will be looking at their draws with an anticipated glee, as if they’d just matched the first three numbers of a lottery draw.
Other games to look out for would be Watford vs Tottenham, which will be a feisty affair given the proximity of the clubs and the fact that Tottenham Hotspur is a rather large bane on the young Watford support; Sunderland vs Middlesbrough, a North-East affair that promises to be driven with passion; and MK Dons/QPR vs Chelsea, which will either be one of the hugest games in the Dons very short history, or a fiery all-London affair in which Chelsea will look to avenge their cataclysmic defeat at Loftus Road earlier in the season.
ITV’s Coverage
I just wanted to add a quick word on ITV’s coverage of the FA Cup. While they have admittedly gotten better, the FA Cup highlights programme is still a very tough watch. For a start, the studio environment looks so cold, stiff and awkward. Matt Smith never appears to be comfortable. He’s sitting in an unnatural way and has the look in his eyes that he doesn’t really know what’s happening. The pundits were a better choice than usual, but they didn’t look very relaxed either. It just seemed for some reason as if they were all ready for a big rush.
You wouldn’t blame them though, because that’s what the programme is in effect. You get the detailed highlights of three or four games and then it’s a one-hundred meter dash to get through the rest of the matches. You get about four seconds of each game which basically just consists of the goals (unless it was a 0-0, in which case you get a customary two chances – one for either side), and then the pundits have to be experts on about thirty different games in one sitting. It’s not the right way to go about it.
It’s a tricky situation, because it would almost be a sin to forego games in order to have a more in-depth look at other matches, but it’s just a shame when a moment of pure bliss such as Ben Arfa’s stunning goal against Blackburn is barely squeezed in for one viewing.
Goal of the Weekend: The aforementioned head-spinner from Hatem Ben Arfa
Performance of the Weekend: Tricky. I’ll go for Swindon Town for their battling display against Wigan.
The ‘Huh, that’s Different’ Award: Paul Scholes, for spontaneously deciding he’d grown tired of sitting like a lemon (more like a tangerine, am I right?).
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