The last two days of football have been half topsy, half turvy. Giants seem to be dropping like big poisoned flies, and the hopeless seem to be rising up with unseen spirit. This is true in the Premier League especially, as we witnessed two of the most unexpected results of the season, along with other title challengers stumbling and a few well-needed displays from bottom-dwellers. It’s been enough to put Martin Tyler into a cataclysm of euphoria so dangerous, he may have to be put into a coma to compensate.
Speaking of which, though I wasn’t able to watch Sunderland’s shock victory over Manchester City on Sky Sports as I’m staying at home and my parents cancelled Sky Sports just a couple of days ago (on the day of a live Pompey game, agonisingly). I have seen a clip of Tyler’s commentary, and it reaffirms him as one of the best, with passion brimming from his lips.
Really though, you’d be absolutely right in accusing me of missing the point by talking about a broadcaster ahead of the game itself (I could go back and change it, but that would involve editing and effort and stuff). Sunderland’s win is such a perfect moment in football. It’s that subversion of everything that should happen in one explosive second. There’s no reason why Manchester City should lose a game like that, and thus a fairytale (of sorts) is born. Die-hard, desperate defending followed by daylight robbery (that doesn’t sound at all like a fairytale, on retrospect).
It seems Martin O’Neill has not so much breathed a new life into the side as emptied his lungs into it. They’ve scored 10 points out of the last 15 and looked a far cry from the fumbling shambles that Steve Bruce inadvertently assembled. Under Bruce’s regime, a lot of the squad seemed very anonymous and you’d be forgiven for not knowing half of Sunderland’s starting eleven. However, the players appear to be making themselves noticed again. Sessegnon has looked like an absolute powerhouse in midfield, Craig Gardner is integrating into the side with total commitment and Seb Larsson is beginning to convert his annoyingly good free-kicks. That said, with such strange results throughout the table, relegation is still a very real threat for many sides, including The Black Cats.
For Manchester City who have thrown away points in three of the last five games, one wonders where things are going wrong. Just a few weeks ago the team were striding from one game to the next with confidence burning the faces of their opponents, but suddenly times seem to have gotten tough and they aren’t looking like championship-certainties anymore. It could be argued that this is just a rough patch, as any team will go through. I expect there will be a better indication of whether or not that is the case over the next few weeks, with a gamit of tough fixtures on the horizon.
However, you do have to call into question their lacking in that all important attribute: experience. Though a truly impressive array of talent on their books, none of today’s Man City starting eleven have been anywhere near a title race (with the exception perhaps of Samir Nasri). It’s an oft-cited excuse that I feel is overblown, but it’s hard to deny that, having been in this position countless times, Manchester United aren’t advantaged in the title race.
That said, United have illustrated their proneness to crumbling like soggy cake. Yesterday’s defeat to Blackburn is the only possible result in football that, given the previous hopelessness of Steve Kean, was more unlikely than Kim-Jong Un being awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. However, despite the almost boringly clichéd United comeback threatening to make a return, Blackburn somehow managed to find a winner and get three of the most precious points in a relegation fight. It takes a lot to win at Old Trafford (unless you’re Man United) and you need many things in your favour to make it happen. That includes a king’s portion of luck, a bit of flair and class on the pitch (in the shape of somebody like Yakubu) some tight defending, David De Gea on the field and an undeterred team spirit. It’s the lattermost that surprises me. I figured Blackburn players would feel lower than the Earth’s core, but for all his shortcomings, Steve Kean appears to be inspiring something in the team.
If Kean can turn things around at Blackburn it would be one of the most remarkable stories in football. I’ve never known a manager to be subject to such bitter protests, yet his wounded heart soldiers on and results have started to turn in his favour. In fact, one wonders if the abuse had touched the United team emotionally, and they let them win because they felt bad for him. That could be Kean's master plan. Whatever though, Blackburn are still a team in deep trouble, but the ray of hope has been cast off the shiny bald head of the Scot.
United’s title ambitions never seemed as fierce for the 2011-2012 season. Though their signings during the summer were good, absent from transfer proceedings was still that one player to make Manchester United into the team to be as utterly feared as they were during the Cristiano Ronaldo days. If they were going to win the league this season, it seemed they would do it quietly and efficiently. However, it’s really been all over the place. They’ve destroyed teams one minute and lost games bizarrely the next. It seems there’s little consistency in the team, and that may be down to the younger element of the squad that came with the summer changes. Lack of experience may just be affecting United as well as City.
Indeed, it could well be the issue for Andre Villas-Boas as well. The Chelsea team itself oozes experience, but their lickle baby of a manager is starved of it. Their defeat to Aston Villa, whilst surprising, caps an awful run of form for The Blues. They appeared to lack the strength and confidence to cope with Aston Villa’s counter attacking football (I must say, it was lovely to watch a real-life Jew Goal performed this weekend).
Chelsea’s title ambitions are probably over. However, the fallen giants around them may give them a view of the greener pastures. They have a long gap to close, and if the transfer market isn’t utilised you’d say the ageing squad doesn’t have enough about it to make any real impact. However, with Chelsea there is always that chance. I’d give them more hope than Tottenham and Arsenal still, because we all know what they are capable of. A big run from here to the end of the season, with a little help from the fellow contenders struggling, may just see them back in contention.
Those were the big three results. I’ll go over the others a bit more briefly, because this looks long and I want to get back to playing Football Manager. Arsenal have been the form side in recent weeks, but their 1-0 win over QPR hasn’t cleansed my feeling that Robin van Persie is carrying that side like a camel with giant haystacks (either the animal fodder or the former wrestler will work in this simile) on its back. The Dutchman’s class made the difference once again, leaving a larger indent in the minds of those who worry about his inevitable injury.
Everyone kept going on about his record for scoring in a calendar year (including John Motson, who when commentating van Persie's goal against Everton completely ignored one of the most amazing physical feats in modern man whilst he was scrabbling around looking for his big book of statistics... I can empathise). While impressive, they only seemed to measure it up against Premier League players, with Alan Shearer being the record holder on 36. I appreciate that the Premier League is now the ‘Common Era’ of football, but really it would’ve been nice to see him compared to Lofthouse or Dean. This fact especially annoyed my Dad, who has now realised that football wasn’t invented until 1992 and all his memories of the game until then was an elaborate mirage perpetrated by Thatcher to give hooligans a place to go.
Bolton got an important point against Wolves in their fight to stave off relegation. Their form has resembled a lingering cold; constantly below par but with that expectation things will different next week. Though they could have done with a win yesterday, the point itself and a more encouraging performance will take away the downer of being bottom of the table. On a side-note, Sam Ricketts’ goal was excellent. I remember hearing him on the radio a month or two back whilst he was still injured, and he seemed like a good bloke, so I’m glad for him (in a cold, distant sort of way).
There was more late drama at Carrow Road as they pulled off a last-minute equaliser to deny Fulham the victory. Orlando Sa, a footballer who thuds against the ‘forget’ button in your memory, looked promising, causing problems all around Norwich’s defence and just being generally annoying. However, the plucky Canaries continue to get the important goals and have stood up to my expectations that they will have a good season. I’m glad for them (in a cold, distant sort of way).
Stoke had a pretty fun game against perennial survivors Wigan. 1-0 down, they won a penalty following Caldwell’s handball as Jerome headed towards goal. Caldwell was sent-off, and there was this strange argument from people who were incensed as the handball wasn’t deliberate. I don’t think that’s really the point when you deny a clear goalscoring opportunity. The opposition needs a concrete retribution on such occasions, and a red card is a good way of ensuring that (it doesn’t always work though, ask Ghana). Anyway, Stoke scored the penalty, Cameron Jerome (who amazes me with his perfection of embodying the word 'average') made it 2-1, and yet those never-say-die Wigolians managed to scrape a point with a late penalty.
A meeting between two of the most entertaining teams in the league, Swansea and Tottenham, ended in a 1-1 draw. It’s another frustration for Spurs, who have nagged away as possible title candidates, but as that sexy Scot Alan Hansen repeatedly says “Tottenham will always let you down”. If letting you down involves a top four finish, I don’t think Spurs fans will mind so much, but with the squad looking so capable and the football being so damn impressive, I think Tottenham not being close to ‘up there’ at the end of the year will feel a little like wasted potential.
And finally, it turns out Victor Anichebe still exists as he scored the winner against West Brom today. I had to check, but the lad is still only 23. It feels like he’s been around for decades, turning up every now and then from a long break to score a goal and then exit the stage for another seven months. At 23, you’d be tempted to say he’s had enough time to prove himself, but with Everton’s striking options looking brittle, Anichebe may still have a role to play at the club.
So that’s the Premier League wrapped up. I would talk about the Championship, but I can’t be bothered. All you need to know is the top two both lost, with Middlesbrough skimping on the chance to mix it up in there by drawing to Peterborough. Portsmouth got a decent result away to Leicester City, with Marko Futacs scoring his first goal in a 1-1 draw. And Watford secured a big win over Doncaster. Other than that, no other football really matters.
Alright, I'm sorry. I do like lower league football, but I haven't seen any of it the past few days. I'll make a bit more effort next time. But really after that, what else is there. I mean, Scottish football? Is that still around?
Anyway, to end this feature is going to be a regular couple of awards. Here they are:
Goal of the Weekend: Sam Ricketts’ sumptuous curler against Wolverhampton.
Team of the Weekend: Sunderland, for their heroic battling against City.
The ‘Huh, that’s different’ Award: Victor Moses, for simply not looking at a penalty.
Football Round-Up, if I can fight off the urge to be an ungodly lazy little oaf, will be a regular feature, so like, come back and stuff.
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